The word ‘adulting’ often gets a bad rap. It’s often used with an ironical edge, a sort of performative groan about paying bills or cooking dinner. We get it. The sudden shift from curated syllabi to open-ended calendars can feel less like a promotion and more like being thrown into the deep end without a lifeguard.
But look at this photo. It’s not a scene from an instruction manual on ‘how to form an adult life.’ There are no spreadsheets visible. There isn’t a single motivational poster.
What we do see is far more relatable and far more important: curated connection and shared curiosity. This, right here, is what adulting really looks like.
Curating Our own Communities
In school, your peers are chosen for you. You share classes, residence halls, and cafeterias. After graduation, those natural community buffers disappear. Building a social life becomes an active, deliberate project. It’s no longer passive.
Adulting is finding these pockets. It’s realizing you don’t need to be everything to everyone; you need to be something specific to a few. Look at the group. The focus isn’t general. They aren’t looking ‘out’ into the world; they’re looking ‘in’ at something specific—a physical artifact of creativity.
This scene suggests that community doesn’t just happen. It’s built, page by page, in quiet rooms over shared passions. Adulting is recognizing that making time for this is just as critical as making rent.
Multitasking is the New Monotasking (We Know, We’re Working on It)
Let’s be real about the image. The woman on the left is holding a phone, presumably checking notifications, while the man on the right holds an open book.
Is this the death of attention? Or is it simply the reality of our current cognitive loading?
Adulting is the constant, low-level buzz of responsibility. You are checking that email about the dental appointment while you’re holding a physical book. Your brain is a switchboard constantly balancing immediate pings with deep-focus tasks. We’d like to say we should drop the phone, but the phone is often the tool of our adulthood (calendar, maps, communications).
The key in the photo isn’t the perfect, monastic focus. It’s the attempt. It’s that, despite the pull of the digital world, physical curiosity (the book) and physical conversation are still central. We are all flawed multitaskers, just trying to keep the important balls in the air.
Continuing the Education (Your Way)
The existence of a specialized art book or zine is telling.
In school, we learn to meet criteria. In adulthood, we must decide what our own criteria for a successful, rich life is. The curriculum is now up to you.
The man holding the book isn’t reading a textbook. He’s engaging with specialized content, likely related to photography, design, or travel. Adulting isn’t closing the book on learning; it’s finally opening the books you actually want to read. It’s the self-directed education that keeps your soul alive while you are busy managing your life. It’s recognizing that shared curiosity is the adhesive that holds community together.
The Bottom Line: Adulting is not a Destination, It’s the Script We are Actively Writing
We need to stop looking for a final ‘check’ from a mythical adult review board. This scene—imperfect, focused, multitasking, but undeniably present—is it. It’s not neat. It doesn’t look like a stock photo. It looks real.
It’s about showing up for the quiet, unglamorous moments just as much as the milestones. It’s choosing your tribe. It’s keeping your mind open. And yes, it’s probably managing the phone while you do it. Adulting isn’t boring; it’s the profound privilege of finally directing the script.